Three Words

Here is a nice presentation that tells us how to strengthen our relationships.

Cheers!

The Importance of Self-Discipline

During the 1960s, psychologist Walter Mischel conducted “the marshmallow test” with four-year-olds in the preschool at Stanford University, to assess each preschooler’s ability to delay gratification. 

Each four-year-old was given one marshmallow. They were told that they could eat it immediately or, if they waited until the researcher returned in 20 minutes, they could have two marshmallows.
 

Some kids in the group just couldn’t wait. They gobbled down the marshmallow immediately. The rest struggled hard to resist eating it. They covered their eyes, talked to themselves, sang, played games, and even tried to go to sleep. The preschoolers who were able to wait were rewarded with two marshmallows when the researcher returned. Twelve to fourteen years later these same kids were reevaluated as teenagers.
 

The differences were astonishing. Those who had been able to control their impulses and delay gratification as four-year-olds, were more effective socially and personally. They had higher levels of assertiveness, self-confidence, trustworthiness, dependability, and ability to control stress. Their Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT) scores were 210 points higher than the “instant gratification” group! 

A key difference between successful people — leaders — and those who struggle to get by, is self-discipline. As Confucius wrote, “The nature of people is always the same; it is their habits that separate them.” 

Cheers!

Is there really a problem?

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus depot, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops - a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.
 

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a Pathan got on. Six feet four, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground.. He glared at the conductor and said, "Pathan doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back.
 

The conductor did not argue with Pathan, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened – Pathan got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the next..
 

This irritated the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way the Pathan was taking advantage of the poor conductor. Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself.
 

So, on the next Monday, when the Pathan once again got on the bus and said, "Pathan doesn't pay!" , the driver stood up, glared back at the Pathan, and screamed, "And why not?"
 

With a surprised look on his face, the Pathan replied,.......... "Pathan has a bus pass."

Management Lesson: Be sure there is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one.

Cheers!

When one’s hands get dirty - The mind remains clean!!

One of Mr. Ratan N Tata's (RNT) first assignments was the stewardship of the ailing electronics company in the Tata portfolio - Nelco. Story goes that a team of senior managers from Nelco was driving to Nasik along with RNT. Halfway into the journey, the car had a flat tyre, and as the driver pulled up, the occupants - including Mr. Tata - got off for a comfort break, leaving the driver to replace the tyre. Some of the managers welcomed the forced break, as it allowed them a much-needed chance to light up a cigarette. Some used the opportunity to stretch, and smile, and share a joke. 

And then, one of them suddenly noticed that Mr. Tata was not to be seen, and wondered aloud where Ratan Tata might have vanished! Was he behind some bush? Had he wandered off inside the roadside dhaba for a quick cup of tea? Or was he mingling with some passer-bys, listening to their stories? 

None of these, in fact, while his colleagues were taking a break, Ratan Tata was busy helping the driver change tyres. Sleeves rolled up, tie swatted away over the shoulder, the hands expertly working the jack and the spanner, bouncing the spare tyre to check if the tyre pressure was ok. droplets of sweat on the brow, and a smile on the face. 

At that moment, the managers accompanying Ratan Tata got a master class in Leadership they haven't forgotten. And that's a moment that the driver of that car probably hasn't forgotten either!
 

Thoughts to ponder:

- When was the last time I rolled up my sleeves to do a task much below my hierarchy? ·

- Do I wait for the big opportunity to showcase my leadership? ·
- Humility is the essence of success. To reach the top and remain there, always start from the   

  bottom, else your days at the top will not last long.

- Seek to find opportunities to lead in everyday moments. ·

- Build your leadership skills one baby step at a time. ·
 

When one’s hands get dirty - The mind remains clean!!

Cheers!

What to do when you are angry?

Once an old Master was travelling with his student, and they passed by a small lake. The Master was feeling thirsty so he told his Student to get some water from the lake. 

The student walked up to the lake. When he reached it, he noticed that right at that moment, a herd of cattle had just crossed through the lake. As a result, the water became very muddy. The student thought, “How can I give this muddy water to my Master to drink!” So he came back and told his Master, “The water in there is very muddy. I don’t think it is fit to drink.” 

After about half an hour, again the Master asked his student to go back to the lake and get him some water to drink. The student obediently went back to the lake. This time too he found that the lake was muddy. He returned and informed the Master about the same. After sometime, again the Master asked his student to go back. The student reached the lake to find the lake absolutely clean and clear with pure water in it. The mud had settled down and the water above it looked fit for drinking. So he collected some water in a pot and brought it to his Master. 

The Master looked at the water and then he looked up at the disciple and said, “See what you did to make the water clean. You waited long and the mud settled down on its own and you got clear water. Your mind is also like that! When it is disturbed, just let it be. Give it a little time. It will settle down on its own. You don’t have to put in any effort to calm it down. It will happen. It is effortless”.

Moral: Whenever you are angry, just give yourself some time. You will gradually calm down, and then you will be able to take the right decisions.

Cheers!

It takes 72 muscles to frown - only 14 to smile!

This is supposed to be a true story which happened in the States. 

A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him down, and hammered the little boy's hands as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from the boy's  both hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery and saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or you wish to take revenge. Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Trucks can be repaired, broken bones and hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take and words we speak while in a rage will haunt us forever.

It takes 72 muscles to frown - only 14 to smile! So keep smiling, After all, we only live once.

Think about how special a smile is. It costs nothing, but has the power to enrich all, who receive it. 

Cheers!

The Pareto principle : 80–20 rule

I had an interesting conversation with a colleague the other day about the 80-20 principle. Normally, a very anxious person, always worried about his deliveries, he seemed calm and composed. I asked him jokingly if it was his New Year resolution. He then seriously said that he was trying to apply the 80-20 rule at work, and see if he can manage things in a better way. We talked more on the subject, and I did some further research on this.

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The Pareto principle (also known as the 80–20 rule, the law of the vital few) states that, for many events, roughly 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes.

Business-management consultant Joseph M. Juran suggested the principle and named it after Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto, who observed in 1906 that 80% of the land in Italy was owned by 20% of the population; he developed the principle by observing that 20% of the pea pods in his garden contained 80% of the peas. He then carried out surveys on a variety of other countries and found to his surprise that a similar distribution applied.

The 80/20 Rule means that in anything a few (20 percent) are vital and many(80 percent) are trivial. In Pareto's case it meant 20 percent of the people owned 80 percent of the wealth. In Juran's initial work he identified 20 percent of the defects causing 80 percent of the problems. Project Managers know that 20 percent of the work (the first 10 percent and the last 10 percent) consume 80 percent of your time and resources. You can apply the 80/20 Rule to almost anything, from the science of management to the physical world.

The distribution is claimed to appear in several different aspects relevant to entrepreneurs and business managers. For example:

• 80% of your output comes from 20% of your effort
• 80% of a company’s profits come from 20% of its customers
• 80% of a company’s turnover comes from 20% of its product line
• 80% of inventory cost comes from 20% of inventory
• 80% of crime is committed by 20% of criminals
• 80% of the world’s wealth is held by 20% of the population
• 80% of your sales is delivered by 20% of your sales force
• 80% of your complaints come from 20% of your customers

The value of the Pareto Principle for a manager is that it reminds you to focus on the 20 percent that matters. Of the things you do during your day, only 20 percent really matter. Those 20 percent produce 80 percent of your results. Identify and focus on those things. If something in the schedule has to slip, if something isn't going to get done, make sure it's not part of that 20 percent. Pareto's Principle, the 80/20 Rule, should serve as a daily reminder to focus 80 percent of your time and energy on the 20 percent of your work that is really important.

Don't just "work smart", work smart on the right things.

Cheers!

Thirukazhukundram temple - a short visit

Wish you all a Very Happy, Prosperous and Peaceful New Year 2013.

The past year has been great, more so in my path of spiritual development which has been highly fulfilling and satisfying.

An opportunity to contribute to a spiritual forum dedicated to spread the teachings of Kanchi Shri Paramacharya came out of the blue exactly one year ago. Infact, I got the call while I was just stepping out of the Brindavan of the Mahaswami at Kancheepuram !!

What started as a means of lending a helping hand to an old friend running the site has transformed me so much in the past one year. Sri Maha Periyava, the great Sage of Kanchi has been constantly guiding me in everything I do, and the journey has been rewarding and fulfilling spiritually. I am indeed blessed.

Please visit the forum www.periva.proboards.com and www.periva.org to know more about the Paramacharya.

I would like to begin this year's post on my short visit to Thirukazhukundram temple last week. The temple is located near Chengelpet.

It was just my husband and me for this trip as my son had exams.

 

Pillayar temple near the Arasa Maram

This was our first visit to this temple. We started early and reached the foothill at 9.30 am. You need to climb the steps leading to the temple on foot. 

There is a temple for Pillayar at the foot hill around an Arasa maram.(Peepal tree). In addition to Lord Ganesha, there are beautiful deities of Dakshnamurthy and Lakshmi Varagar too.

The climb uphill was not difficult as I thought. The steps are neatly laid and only about  half feet in height. The laying of the steps has been sponsored by several devotees whose names are inscribed on the side walls. A steel raining on either side provides a grip while climbing. We reached the temple at the summit in 30 mins as I am a slow climber. However, the Sannidanam opened at about 10.00 am only.  

The moolarvar Shri Vedagiriswarar is a beautiful sight to see and worship.  There are deities of Vinayaka and Murugan at the entrance. The unique feature is that there is no Nandi before the Shivalingam. The floral decorations made to the main deity quickly reminds us of the Shri Annamalaiyar temple at Thiruvannamalai.

We had a good darshan. The cool breeze and the view from the hill top was wonderful.

One has to return via another path to visit a cave and the place where the two eagles were fed every noon by the temple priest till the 1990's. Unfortunately, we missed this as we returned via the same path we climbed. We realized it after climbing down about 200 steps, but were too tired to climb up again!. So, when you visit, make sure you do not miss these spots even though the pakshi's (eagle's) do not visit the temple now. I got the reason for this from the archakar in the big temple at the foot hill.

The temple dedicated to Goddess Tiripusasundari is at the foot of the hill. The Lord here is known as . Ambal here is suyambu. The temple is currently under renovation.

             

         

Another significant feature is this town is the Sangu Theertham which is one of the several theerthams in the regiion. It is a really big tank. The legend has that Saint Markandeya, who visited the temple wished to perform abhishekam to the Siva lingam here, but he found no vessel to take the water. Just then a conch suddenly emerged from the tank, and Markandeya performed the abhishekam. It is said that even now, once in 12 years, a conch emerges from this Sangu Theertham , which the temple authorities collect with all honours and preserve in the temple. 

Sangu Theertham

The archakas at the temple told me that the last conch was collected during September 2011.

All these conches are used to perform the Sangabhisekham for Shri Vedagiriswarar at the hill top temple once a year on the last Monday in the month of Karthigai. After this, all the conches are preserved in the temple at the foot hill only. You can have a darshan of the sacred conches after buying a ticket for Rs:2/- per head.

Here is  picture of the sacred conches. The big white conch that you see is over 1000 years old and this is the one which appeared from the Sangu Theertham to Saint Markandeya. The recent one collected in Sept 2011 is the small one you will see right in the front. All these conches are those collected in this century. The remaining ones are preserved separately.

 

Sacred Conches from the Sangu Theertham

I was actually curious as to why the two eagles have stopped visiting the temple. Legend has that two Rishis Boosha and Vithatha, are the two eagles that have been visiting Thirukazhukundram daily since time immemorial, in order to worship Shiva and obtain salvation from His curse. The archakar at the temple told me that since the eagles (rishi's) have obtained salvation, there is no need for them to be visiting again. The eagles have stopped coming after the 90's.

There is another Shiva temple in this town for Shri Rudrakoteeswarar. It was after 12.00 noon by the time we reached the temple, and the temple was closed at that time. We returned regretfully hoping that we will get to visit the temple on another occasion.

On the whole, a nice darshan on Prodosham day.

Cheers!