One day, some tiny frogs arranged a running competition between them. The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower. A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer the contestants. The race began. No one in the crowd truly believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower. Some said, "They will never make it to the top. They will never succeed. The tower is too high!"
The tiny frogs began collapsing, one by one, except for a few who kept climbing higher and higher. The crowd continued to scream, "It's very difficult! No one will make it to the top!".
More tiny frogs got tired, and gave up, but one continued higher and higher. This one would simple not give up! At the end, everyone else had given up climbing the tower, except one tiny frog. After a big effort, he was the only one who reached the top! All the other frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it?
A contestant asked the tiny frog how he found the strength to succeed and reach the goal.
It turned out that the winner was deaf !! He had thought that the crowd was encouraging him the entire time!
The tiny frogs began collapsing, one by one, except for a few who kept climbing higher and higher. The crowd continued to scream, "It's very difficult! No one will make it to the top!".
More tiny frogs got tired, and gave up, but one continued higher and higher. This one would simple not give up! At the end, everyone else had given up climbing the tower, except one tiny frog. After a big effort, he was the only one who reached the top! All the other frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it?
A contestant asked the tiny frog how he found the strength to succeed and reach the goal.
It turned out that the winner was deaf !! He had thought that the crowd was encouraging him the entire time!
Moral: An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day. So be careful of what you say to those who cross your path. The power of words… it is sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way.
Cheers!
Nicely narrated... Would like to share one more statement given by Dr.Abdul Kalam:
ReplyDeleteMy dad also told me that psychologists claim it takes seventeen positive statements to offset one negative statement. I have no idea if it is true, but the logic holds true. It might take up to seventeen compliments to offset the emotional damage of one harsh criticism.
These are concepts that are especially useful when raising children.
Ask yourself how many compliments you give yourself daily versus how many criticisms. Heck, I know you are talking to yourself all day long. We all have internal voices that give us direction.
So, are you giving yourself the 17:1 ratio or are you shortchanging yourself with toxic self-talk like, " I'm fat. Nobody will like me. I'll try this diet. I'm not good enough. I'm so stupid. I'm broke, etc. etc."
If our parents can set a lifetime of programming with one wrong statement, imagine the kind of programming you are doing on a daily basis with your own internal dialogue.
Here is a list of Toxic Vocabulary words.
Notice when you or other people use them.
Ø But: Negates any words that are stated before it.
Ø Try: Presupposes failure.
Ø If: Presupposes that you may not.
Ø Might: It does nothing definite. It leaves options for your listener..
Ø Would Have: Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen.
Ø Should Have: Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen (and implies guilt.)
Ø Could Have: Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen but the person tries to take credit as if it did happen.
Ø Can't/Don't: These words force the listener to focus on exactly the opposite of what you want. This is a classic mistake that parents and coaches make without knowing the damage of this linguistic error.
Examples:
Toxic phrase: "Don't drop the ball!"
Likely result: Drops the ball
Better language: "Catch the ball!"
Toxic phrase: "You shouldn't watch so much television."
Likely result: Watches more television.
Better language: "I read too much television makes people stupid. You might find yourself turning that TV off and picking up one of those books more often!"
Exercise:
Take a moment to write down all the phrases you use on a daily basis or any Toxic self-talk that you have noticed yourself using. Write these phrases down so you will begin to catch yourself as they occur and change them.